Category Archives: Compassion

#Tie #Names #Stories #Questions

Posted on by freshencounter

#Tie #Names #Stories #Questions: – Last week while coaching at the Craigslist Foundation Bootcamp, I met a Euro-American woman, who told me about the DNA test her Chinese adopted daughter took to learn about her ancestry. The results were surprising to them both. When I returned home later that day I began doing research on agencies who provided this service. Because NY state, like most others, lock their adoption records; most adoptees have no clues to their past beyond what may appear obvious, their hair and skin tone. I thought it would be great if I could find out what tribes and countries could be found in my DNA.

And that idea led me this morning to look up the origin of my “original” birth surname, Lewis. I use quotes around original because many adoptees are lied to about birth dates, circumstances and names, but that’s what I have to work with right now…
Continue reading →

#Tie #Exhale #Breathe

Posted on by freshencounter

#Tie #Exhale – #Breathe E_X_A_L_E – Japan_Breathe – Haiti_Exhale – Revolutions_ Breathe – Illness of self, loved ones, friends_Exhale – Wisconsin_Breathe… Breath is life. Breath creates space. When we focus on our breath we are more available to ourselves, others and the universe. Focused breathing prevents panic.
Pause now, check your breath; what is it saying? What are you feeling? Is there something you need to change/do? Is it time for a walk? :-) I’m doing that next.
Continue reading →

#Tie #Tears

Posted on by freshencounter

#Tie #Tears – Tears forming from the pressure in my head – boiling from my eyes – scorching my cheeks – warming your thighs – free, free, I am free.

Crying, though I’m getting better at it, may be one of my least favorite things, next to going to the gym. So I joined a gym yesterday and maybe sometime this weekend with my lovely wife, I’ll find space to cry. And most likely, they will be tears of joy as we celebrate out 2nd wedding anniversary and our 6+ years of being in love.

Tears, Tears, forming from the pressure in my heart, bubbling joyfully…from my eyes, warming our cheeks, wetting our lips, flowing, flowing free, free, free…

“I have found that tears can set us free and when we are all free, we’ll all be free.” Fresh! 10.29.10 freshencounter.org

#Tie #Failure – Fail! fail! fail!! – For success

Posted on by freshencounter

#Tie #Failure – Fail! fail! fail!! In my life I have failed at walking, talking, bicycling, writing, reading, understanding, driving, hooping, batting, swimming and yes even coaching :-) And, that’s how I got better. And yes I have failed at living fully in my values, gossiping, judging and I get better at that every day, everyday! I’m not talking about perfection here.
Continue reading →

#Tie #Queer – Queer!

Posted on by freshencounter

#Tie #Queer – Queer! – My definition: Way out of the box! Queer means I’m NOT normal! Queer means I dance to my-own-beat and the beat of the world, not the beat created by the market. Queer means I accept ALL of the consensual ways you are sexual, even though I may not be attracted to it.

Queer is the first “Q” in LBGTQQI :-) and for many of us, stands for all of us and beyond.
Continue reading →

#Tie #Gentrification – Indigenous Peoples Day

Posted on by freshencounter

#Tie #Gentrification – Indigenous Peoples Day – This morning I was remembering how all over the world indigenous people continue to be oppressed. Not a happy thought, obviously. I then thought about how Indigenous North Americans in our civilized/Just countries continue to struggle and have to fight for basic needs such as healthcare, schools, teachers, and access to healthy water – today, right now. I also can’t help but think about the many ways we practice gentrification today.
Continue reading →

#Tie #Femme – FEMME!!

Posted on by freshencounter

#Tie #Femme – FEMME!! Gets me excited just writing the word – Femme!

Femme! Not the opposite of Butch, that’s a butch fantasy – except of course when she wants to be. Otherwise, Femmes can stand alone and/or with each other without any need for a butch to qualify them – as Femme.
Continue reading →

#Tie #Shame – #Trouble

Posted on by freshencounter

#Tie #Shame – #Trouble – Yesterday Jen Cross and I talked about what it meant to be “in trouble” and specifically at work, but generally, well…just in general. We agreed that the idea of “getting in trouble” with someone is childish and ridiculous. I believe that it’s an old threat that is focused on shame and shaming. As adults we take responsibility for our actions, then we work with/accept the consequences – we don’t “get in trouble”, (unless of course we’re doing it for fun.)
Continue reading →

it gets different (doesn’t it?) – Jen Cross

Posted on by freshencounter

Jen Cross responds to recent suicides amongst youth who are or are assumed to be queer.


“Today I feel helpless and sad: gender-based violence isn’t ending, not for folks who have been assigned to “woman” and not for folks who’ve been assigned to “man.” The borders of each of these genders is so violently patrolled; no one has to be gay or queer to get bullied because someone thinks they’re not acting like a real man, or like a real woman. When are we going to stop?”

http://writingourselveswhole.org/